i wake up this morning from a night's sleep which i never slept. a ton load of work to study and i don't have a plan. general pathology or systemic???? damn... why the heck did i have to choose?? i call with an intention of setting things right.. damn, i had to lose my temper.. push aniruddh, push aniruddh.... see what happens... And then the words i never wanted to hear for a long time to come "its off"..i don't remember what the exact words were, but it was more or less the same.. thoughts::::
shit!!! its actually over.. i don't beleive this... make sure what u heard was right.. Damn this is it... Do something!!! Do something!!!:::::


"I'm sorry and i really mean it... do u know what u've just done???
is there no way u're going to go back on what u said??? How could this happen to me??? Ok, i don't think i want to talk to u anymore...bye"

Call back

"are u really sure??? go back atleast for my sake.... I love u!! i always will... bye"

thoughts::::
dude, u have a truck load of stuff to study... put yoursef together... Start with 'renals'...
'immunologic mechanism of glomerular damage'... I didn't ask for this... what did i do wrong??? I have given it so much... 1.local immune complex deposits... i love her... mainly due to bacterial,viral immune complex deposits not of glomerular origin... i have to go shower,that'll make me feel better.

phone call
"i didn't think this would happen.. i didn't know u guys were going through a rough patch.. i don't know what to say.. chill,just let things settle down a bit and the u talk to her today.. i think i will.. be as if nothing's happened,u'll feel better.. thanks man.. take care.. bye"

thoughts::::
this feels so good..why?? why?? why??.. Soap..i feel like running away.. wats the point??stay here for ten mins and u'll be alright.. i didn't deserve this..shut up and get clean